Schnuber schnooze revealed

My bro-in-law made mention to schnuber schnooze in a recent post. I thought it may be entertaining or even educational to explain the origin of this strange term. Let me take you way back - to the 1970's. A decade of disco, bell bottoms, and velour shirts (of which I had many). My good pal (heretofore referred to as Johnny T) and I were busy building model cars. On one trip to the Five and Dime store (only you old timers know that one) he showed me a model of a German half-track vehicle with a name too difficult to pronounce. I said, "oh look, it's a schnuber schnooze!" At this point, snot erupts from Johhny T's nose as he laughs uncontrollably. I also laughed but remained in control of all bodily fluids. When he was finished laughing, Johnny T beckoned me to get him a tissue, alas none was to be found. He wiped his snot on the box of the schnuber schnooze and we prmpotly left the store. To this day, the act of any fluid erupting from one's nose is known as schnuber schnooze. How I long for yesterday.

My Dog Lucky

While going through her backpack, we found this classroom assignment completed by the girl:

My Dog Lucky
My dog Lucky is a collie. He is cute and very fuzzy. Lucky is red, brown, and white. Lucky is brain damaged. Before we got him when he was just a little puppy, a little boy threw him in his pool and he drownded. When people knock on the door he barks a lot. My dog Lucky is the cutest most fuzziest dog ever!

Very cute, and very disturbing at the same time. I have questions, as I am sure you all do too. Better left unasked.