Spelling champ

Trying to get kids to do chores can be a chore. Yesterday, the Wife was teasing the Boy for not wanting to help her with the dishes. The Wife: L-A-Z-Y, you ain't got no alibi, you're lucky, I mean you're ugly, no lazy. That's it lazy! The Boy: And you wonder why I can't spell.

Blue dumplings

To those of you who may not know, I am colorblind (the next person that asks "What color is this?" gets a head slap). Every so often, the kids try to get one over on their dad using colors. Last week, the Boy was making Sunday night dinner and decided to put blue food coloring in the dumplings. I noticed they looked different but didn't really pay much attention. Then I noticed everyone staring at me with smirks on their faces. The Boy: Dad, how are your dumplings? Me: OK, what did you do to them? The Wife: He made them blue. Everyone cracks up laughing, the jokes on poor old color blind dad. Paybacks are h*ll, when you least expect it, expect it.