I feel pretty

This morning, my trusty bar of Dial soap fell apart into splinters. I went to the closet for another bar, but alas there was none. The wife tells me there is a fresh bar of soap two shelves down. To my horror, I see that it is a bar of Caress - chick soap! I have no choice but to force myself to use it.

Oddly enough, I have this strange urge to walk on the beach with my mom and talk about feeling fresh, to frolic in a meadow of daisies, to have a wine and cheese picnic. Gotta go, I feel another hot flash coming on.